Yes, it’s December 31st and the end of another year. It’s also, as everyone knows, the end of the decade. It’s a natural time to reflect on the last 12 months, or the last 10 years….those frameworks and labels with which we measure time.

I don’t recall feeling terribly nostalgic at the last decade change. But alas, here we are again. It’s interesting to look back.

In this decade, I saw the next phase of my career begin…with challenges and blessings I could not have foreseen. It occurs to me that by this time 10 years from now, I’ll be close to retirement eligibility…whether or not that will ever happen is anyone’s guess. Lord willing I make it.

Over the last 10 years, I’ve lost weight…and gained it back….and lost it again…and gained it back….but I finally, FINALLY learned that while “diet” is important – unless I incorporate permanent changes to WHAT I eat (not just how much) and actually move my ass on a pretty daily basis…I will yo-yo until I’m dead. Not making those changes will make the “dead” come sooner than later.

This past decade saw significant loss of another kind…my dad in January 2013 and my mom less that 3 years later in November 2015. The first part of this decade was spent caring for them….financially and in many other ways that I never thought possible. Their loss and the subsequent loss of my childhood home had a huge impact. I became an orphan. Again.

My folks had always answered any question about my adoption…but once they were gone, I started asking more questions myself. The last part of this decade saw my hiring a genealogy investigator…finding some answers, but not all, connecting with some cousins, but siblings having no interest (and understandably so)…finding that those who conceived me are long past…and my beginning was less than auspicious. Most importantly, realizing what I already knew….my mom was Pat, my dad was Chris…the rest is just trivia and has no bearing on who I am today.

In this decade, I turned 50…and currently getting closer to the midpoint to 60. My mom’s voice echos “It’s just a number”…and I see those around me who handle aging with grace and aplomb. My 67 year old sister in law who still teaches aerobics, my almost 98 year old mother in law who always has a beautiful manicure and loves her bling. Getting older bring challenges, of course – I have arthritis in my knee, I’m on blood pressure medication, my hands are getting the wrinkles I used to tease my mom about (Karma is a bitch)….but in my head, I feel no different than I did when I was 26…just a little wiser, hopefully.

A glance in the rear view mirror allows us to reminisce, take stock of what we’ve learned, be sad for losses…but rejoice in whatever we’ve gained and won. However, perhaps its even more important to look ahead…be grateful for the friends and family we have, the anticipation of good times ahead…knowing there will be more losses, more heartbreak, more choices.

My favorite poem by Robert Frost – The Road Not Take ends with:

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.”

Time to travel into the 2020’s my friends. Keep your eyes on the road – and choose wisely.